Wednesday, January 27, 2010

First Things First

Every night before I pass out in complete exhaustion (or when the repetitive motion of grinding my teeth has lulled me into dreamless oblivion), I thank the Universe for what I've been given. It doesn't matter what it is or how it was given, I am thankful.

In my last post, I mentioned how my success is a new concept to me and I have tried to slough it off, as one does with leftover popcorn after a movie. You've enjoyed stuffing your face with the delicious buttery goodness; but now, you're reminded of your previous gluttony and disregard for your appearance and you swipe at the remains like flies in the Sumatra.

If I cannot revel in it, then what's there to look forward to?

So,  I have partnered up with the wonderful Hartley Steiner and other fantastic writers for a new series starting in February called First Things First. It is a series of articles from families on and around the Spectrum. My article will come out in September 2010, but I will be posting the other participant's articles as they are published.

My article will focus on the single parent angle of having a child on the Spectrum, which I didn't realize until recently wasn't a common thing. I won't reveal what I'm writing about (ahhh...keeping you baited and hooked!), but it's due in April, so I have a little time to flesh it out.

I am honored to be a part of this group and am very excited to get and spread the word out to a larger audience. I hope that you all will enjoy it as well!

It is 10:27 now. I've been up for 16 going on 17 hours. I've folded metric tons of laundry, hand washed dishes which have been lounging in my sink for days and why can't they wash themselves, thank you very much! I took a Child Abuse Prevention Course earlier this morning and then when I got back to my car, I realized that someone had parked SO close to it, that I couldn't even get IN. I left a delightfully tart and snarky note on their windshield, letting them know that next time they should leave me a crowbar.

Nathan has been super sweet this week, with a few exceptions. I'm not saying that he's not adorable, but he's been extra affectionate and doting on me, and it's nice. Sometimes I feel he doesn't know I'm there, or he forgets that I'm there. There are days when he only asks for me when he needs things and I feel very much like the hired help.  I told him I didn't think we were connecting. 

He said, "Connecting like magnets?"
I chuckled, "Yes, honey, like magnets."
"Magnets have positive and negative?" he questioned.
"Yes, they do," I responded.

"And what are we doing?" he asked.
"Well...I think we're both negative." I explained.
"Let's change that, Mom! Give me a hug!"

See that? Just plain sweet.

I was worried I wasn't going to get this post out because when he's awake, you can count on him to either need me for something or constantly change what he's doing, like going from TV watching to drawing something with commentary or Lego building with sound effects. This, unfortunately, throws me off my rhythm and I am just LOST. I throw a life preserver out to the sea of my ambition and gone, gone it is. Gone it goes and gone it shall stay.  When he finally does succumb to slumber, I of course, am at a cross roads of exhaustion and necessity. I was internally whining to myself that I never get anything done past 10 PM and that Nathan had thrown me off my schedule and I was all jangly in the nerves, like a demented jester. I was blaming it all on Nathan, when it was truly all me. I decided to pull up my big girl tights, suck it up and get to writing.

And I did. I am happy and relieved that I did. 

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